Ever wondered why two or more people observing the same event can have sometimes very different perspectives of what happened and often then act in very different ways to the same situation? Dr William Glasser’s Choice Theory Chart of How the Brain Works explains the processes occurring in each person’s brain and provides an opportunity to understand the reasons for these differences.
Our Reality (Real World) is comprised of people, things and situations that exist in the objective world in which we live. To make sense of the Real World, everyone interprets data through their unique perception of sensory information. They then compare this against their own personal ideals.
Our perceptions are based on our previous knowledge (Total Knowledge Filter) and, if no meaning is detected, our perception stops there. If, on the other hand, we recognise or want to find out more, (knowing), it passes through our Valuing Filter where we experience the information as a pleasurable, painful, or neutral perception.
The Ladder of Inference, a concept introduced by Chris Argyris, also illustrates the mental process we go through when making sense of the world around us. With similar processes as the Choice Theory Chart, it also describes how our thoughts and beliefs can shape our actions and influence the outcomes of our interactions. Within the Ladder of Inference, there are reflexive loops that describe how our beliefs and interpretations influence our data selection. This leads to actions that reinforce those initial beliefs. Argyris emphasises that our reasoning process is often unconscious and that we jump to conclusions without fully examining our assumptions.
Understanding the difference between perception and reality is crucial for effective communication, problem-solving and building stronger relationships. So next time you have an experience that you have perceived differently to someone else, I invite you to be curious about whether you are ‘re-acting’ to the situation or consciously ‘responding’. As John Dewey said: ‘we do not learn from experience… we learn from reflecting on experience’.
Thank you Cath for sharing your thoughts on Perception. I recently attended a recorded, online workshop with Bessel van der Kolk. A big take away for me was the brain research he presents in the workshop, on how trauma effects the body, the brain. For me simply stated, how the emotional brain is highly fired up; after trauma, perceived trauma, neglect, abuse, and one can include continual critique, (maybe receiving controlling habits from another person?) and how this impacts on how one perceives the situation. The fired up right brain Emotional brain, causes the thinking brain, Per-frontal cortex, to be out of order, not thinking properly. So one is reacting. This is what Chris Argyris describes as well, the reaction, that we may hold our beliefs subconsciously. I interpreted Van der Kolk’s words as that our rational mind goes off-line, and we are then subject to the emotional response, often irrational, and from created habits and expectations from our warning, alert emotional system, as” it is happening again”, I cant handle it”, or other negative beliefs that come from the old experience. I do like how you quoted John Dewey: “we do not learn from experience… we learn from reflecting on experience’.. And then having the courage to make the decision, the choice, to reconnect with the rational, thinking mind, and respond using the caring habits, with focus on the quality of the relationship, from internal psychology.